Resolving Member Complaints

Steps to resolving member complaints swiftly and compassionately

SexPositive Portland realizes that there may be times when one member purposely or more likely, unintentionally, crosses another member’s boundaries. If this happens to you, we ask that you immediately follow the below path to resolution. Please do not wait more than a few days!

If this is a minor issue: Talk to the person! We are always afraid to talk to people! Practice your new communication skills. Always use 'I' statements and not 'you' statements. Share your hurt without accusations. Did this work? If YES, you have potentially created a new friend!! If NO then go to the next step of filling out a claim form and cease all communication with the person you are reporting. Both parties will be contacted and brought through the mediation process to build community healing.

Is this a 'major' issue? Fill out a complaint form and the care coordinator will be contacting you both.

Step 1

If the severity of the incident is minor, we ask that directly communicate with the person. Let the person know that what they have done is not acceptable to you and that they should not do it again. If you feel comfortable that they get it and that they will be more aware and respectful of your boundaries in the future, then no more action in needed. If they don’t seem to get it, please go to the next step.

Step 2

Fill out this complaint form and send it to SPP Concerns via Meetup messaging. Cease all communication with the person you are reporting. Both parties will be asked not to attend events past Level One while report is being reviewed.

Please read the Member Communication Agreement and agree to follow the recommendations of not participating in gossip, hearsay, or coalition building against the person as this only inflames sentiments and makes it harder to get to the bottom of things.

Step 3

You will be contacted by one of our members in the Membership Concern and Conflict Committee. Please have all available documentation and witness statements available for review, that includes text streams, emails, voicemails, or any other communication you have.

If the incident was fairly minor, often, it is enough that we talk to the person and give them coaching and training for how to be better with boundaries. However, for stronger claims, it is necessary that we have both parties in the room in order to clear things up. In that case, both parties must be in attendance, unless the evidence is overwhelming and it is agreed that it would be detrimental to the claimant to be there.

We take claims very seriously. At the same time, we recognize that in some instances it is more a matter of perception and even personality clashes that are at the heart of the matter, rather than that a true wrong has taken place. Thank you for working with us to lessen conflict and spread love!